AN' is it Christmas mornin'? I've lost my count of time,
But I thought it must be Christmas, by the bells' sweet solemn chime;
And I had a dream of the home-folks, just as the mornin' broke;
Maybe 'twas the bells that brought it, ringin' before I woke.
An' is it Christmas mornin'? An' while I'm lyin' here
The folks to church are goin', the bells do ring so clear—
Father an' mother an' children, merrily over the snow,
Just as we always used to go on Christmas long ago.
Oh yes, I know you're good, nurse, — an' I do not try to fret,
But at Christmas-time no wonder if my eyes with tears are wet,
For in my dream I saw so plain the brown house by the mill,
An' my father an' my mother; ah, me! are they there still?
And as they go to church to-day, oh, do they think of me,
An' wonder where poor Katie is beyond the great blue sea?
An' well it is they cannot tell, an' may they never know,
For sure 'twould only break their hearts to hear my tale of woe!
My mother must be getting old, an' she was never strong,
But then her spirit was so bright, an' sweet her daily song,—
She sings no more about the house, but still she thinks of me,
An' wipes away the dropping tears for one she ne'er may see.
My father's bent with honest toil and trouble bravely borne,
But never has he had to bear a word or look of scorn,
An' never shall it come through me; for all I have been wild,—
I'd rather die a thousand deaths than shame him in his child!
Oh yes, I have been sinful; but some were more to blame,
Who never think because of that to hang their heads for shame.
Ah, well, I mustn't think of them, but of myself, and pray
That He will take away the sin who came on Christmas Day!
An' thank you for the letter, nurse, you say the ladies brought.
'Twas kind of them to think of me; I thank them for the thought.
The print is easy read, but, oh, what would I give to see
Just one small scrap of writin' from the old home folks to me!
But, nurse, those bells seem tellin' of the better home above,
Where sin and sorrow cannot come, but all is peace an' love,
Where broken hearts are healed at last, an' darkness passed away,
An' He shall bid us welcome home who came on Christmas Day!
About this Poem
"Christmas in the Hospital" appeared in the 1899 edition of Lays of the "True North" and Other Canadian Poems by Agnes Maule Machar (a digital edition was published by Canadian Poetry Press).
The portrait of Agnes Maule Machar is from Canadian Singers and Their Songs: a Collection of Portraits, Autograph Poems and Brief Biographies, compiled by Edward S. Caswell (Toronto: McCleland & Stewart, 1919). Read more about the life of Agnes Maule Machar in the online Dictionary of Canadian Biography.